Dating limits

Limits can be defined by the following six qualities: A boundary in relationship encounters is communicating no verbally or in your behavior, and meaning it!

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As with all comedy, timing is everything in effectively setting limits.Act too quickly and the other party believes he or she has been rejected or negatively judged, and may develop a suspicious, untrusting attitude.The longer you wait to set necessary limits, the greater the likelihood someone else will be compelled to institute boundaries for you.Here’s a useful strategy: you set essential limits and structures fairly early on in order to reap the gains of these desired freedoms and build in safeguards against others needing to set them for you. It’s not about being controlling; it’s about spotting the unset limit, soon acting assertively in setting it and designing what works.William Golding’s book (1954) and Peter Brook’s subsequent 1963 movie provide a scintillating, chilly portrait of what results in a society without rules, laws and authority.

This story depicts a band of young boys in their struggle to eke out their survival when stranded on an island.Some just declare limits to be saying, “No” and meaning it.Disciplines of every imaginable kind help provide structured limits that enhance the control we have over our behavior.Rules bring an ordered structure by delineating acceptable standards of behavior.Although many individualists may complain, act out and flaunt laws, they usually prefer them to the chaos and unpredictable consequences of not having them.The boys in Golding’s island speak up for their preference for adult authority and moral standards of right and wrong, even as they witness the escalating madness that demolishes their world.