Funny stories of sex and dating

About a week later, she’s back at the doctor, where she says, "Doc, the pill worked great! It wasn't five minutes later that he jumped up, raked all the food and dishes onto the floor, grabbed me, ripped all my clothes off, and ravaged me right there on the table!

Tell her that we have zero tolerance for inappropriate behavior.If you don’t feel comfortable saying this, then you can go in the break room and I’ll tell her.She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. A lady comes home from her doctor's appointment grinning from ear to ear. " The wife says, "The doctor told me that for a forty-five year old woman, I have the breasts of a eighteen year old." "Oh yeah?" quipped her husband, "What did he say about your forty-five year old ass? She answers, "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie?You always have the choice to experience our sites without personalized advertising based on your web browsing activity by visiting the DAA's Consumer Choice page, the NAI's website, and/or the EU online choices page, from each of your browsers or devices.

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" Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK." Wife: "What does that mean?

" Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot." Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK? " A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband is losing interest in sex.

When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.

Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house.

We never saw either of them again, though.) “Oh, yeah, and here there are a lot of oaks and pines that have to be taken out because it’s gotten too warm for them to survive. As she could see I was still a little apprehensive, she offered to take some samples to send away for an STD test just for my peace of mind, which I agreed to. You obviously have gonorrhoea and I know you didn’t get it from me. How she got my number I don’t know, but she was furious, claiming that I had knowingly given my ex gonorrhoea, which he had then given to her. He lied and told her we had broken up well before we actually did.